get my life back on track

i've thought thru things pretty long and hard... and i've decided dat i'm not gonna let anyone ruin my life for me... i'm not going to throw my life away cuz of a few bad incidents... i'm gonna make da best out of what i have now and not lament over what i do not have yea? i guess i should get over all this and try to get my life back on track... =)

sLeepin daY

everyone was sleeping in klass today *lol*

my family sucks so bad right now

the day was going pretty well... and i actually thought that things were looking up... who was i kidding?

i guess i'm never gonna be good enough for my parents... i can never beat her... of cuz she's smarter, prettier and way better than me... even if she were to do da worst thing in da world, she would still be better than me, even if i try my best to be what they want...

my family doesn't even seem like a family anymore... everyone lost in their own worlds, thinkin of no one else but themselves... and sometimes even i marvel at da facade we put up... such a loving family, but no one knows what lies underneath... no one cares abt each other... it's a to each its own world we live in... but i guess i'm slowly getting used to it... sooner or later, i guess i wun care abt how this family turns out anymore... and maybe then my life wouldn't be so painful.

Poem

My life was in tatters
Way before you came
God played with my life
As though it was all just a game

You then came into my life
And made every trouble seem so small
You made everything so bearable
And my life wasn't a game anymore

But things got out of hand
And there wasn't anything you could do
I guess everything took a toll on me
And I walked out, so foolishly and so soon

And now my life is in tatters
And there isn't anyone to help me through
My life has once again become the joke of many others
And whether I can get through all this, I have no clue...

damien readin bianbian comics

damien readin bianbian comics... lol

julia being serious

whoa... julia being serious

laughing at da com

laughing at da com =)

shawnnyyy acting cool

shawnnyyy acting cool

bLeah

da whole world is against me... the world hates me... i hate da world... everybody hates me... i hate everybody... i'm stupid, moronic, spasticated and i can never do anything right... i'm a burden to everyone... i'm of no use... i'm useless... and he isn't there to make it all better.

tues blues

today wasn't a bad day... just that everyone's a lil moody, well, it's da first day of da week what do u expect?

a nagging thought in my head... i wonder sometimes, is it me? why is it that i get da worst deal? sometimes, i think i need his support, and den i remember, oh yea, he's gone... i'm all on my own now... everything is just so screwed up right now... i just hope that i can sort everything out.

Incomplete

-Incomplete-

Empty spaces fill me up with holes
Distant faces with no place left to go
Without you within me I can't find no rest
Where I'm going is anybody's guess

I've tried to go on like I never knew you
I'm awake but my world is half asleep
I pray for this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I'm going to be is incomplete

Voices tell me I should carry on
But I am swimming in an ocean all alone
Baby, my baby
It's written on your face
You still wonder if we made a big mistake

I've tried to go on like I never knew you
I'm awake but my world is half asleep
I pray for this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I'm going to be is incomplete

I don't mean to drag it on, but I can't seem to let you go
I don't wanna make you face this world alone
I wanna let you go (alone)

I've tried to go on like I never knew you
I'm awake but my world is half asleep
I pray for this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I'm going to be is incomplete

Incomplete

The Right Decision

i guess after sleeping for a while, my mind cleared... i now realise that i was a lil unreasonable, and that both of us had a part to play in this whole incident... but still, i dun think anything can be done at this point of time... i think i'm gonna give this whole relationship up...

but so what if i've lost him? i still have all my friends, ppl who probably care more abt me than he ever would... i'm sure i've made da right decision.

no longer a part of his life

i think i made a very big mistake... i shouldn't have gotten to know him... if i din get to know him, i wouldn't have liked him... and now i'm trapped... i like him so much... i really do... and yet all this has to happen... he has hurt me so much... i guess he wasn't the guy i thought he was.

why did it turn out this way? maybe i should have listened to what my friends' said... and now i've got myself stuck in this mess... u know sth? i really wish i could tell him how i feel, really i do... but i guess it would be useless wouldn't it? after all, things have already come to this stage, i don't think anything can be done anymore... he has hurt me so much unknowingly... i guess i'm no longer a part of his life.

My Kuku Classmates

My Kuku Classmates


Shawnnyyy Babe


Julia Sweetie


Gorgeous Fahmz


Shitbag Sian Yang


Kuku Meeee


Hammie Rinaaa

not good enough?

today i was supposed to go swimming and guess what? it was raining da whole day... but it's alright i spent da whole saturday in bed *lol*

today was a boring day... i have no idea what i was doin stuck at home da whole day... i was bored outta my mind... hmmm at least tmr i wun be stuck at home... =)

today i realised that we're drifting further and further apart... who was i kiddin? it never is gonna work... it was really dumb of me to think that... i mean, we're worlds apart... maybe i'm never gonna be good enough?

learn to live with it

came home to shit today... everyone was in a crappy mood, my sis hollering abt god-knows-what, mum nagging... everyone was squabbling with each other... sometimes i really wonder why i bother trying to come home early everyday... it's such a pain to be at home... i know that things right now aren't that great and i do try to make things better... things never seem to be better, no matter how hard i try...

i hate this kinda life... i really do... no one is ever happy in this hse... sometimes i wonder, what da fuck went wrong exactly? why have things turned out this way? there's never a day when da family can actually come together and last a day without fighting... i guess i'm resigned to fate now... no matter what i do, nothing is gonna help improve things ard here... maybe i just have to learn to live with it.

maybe

maybe i'm just not good enough...

sick or sth

today was probably da worst lesson of my life... i had no clue what was going on... oh well, probably just another C... i feel as though i'm wastin my time here in rp... rotting away... and so is everyone else... omg, i hope things start to get interesting ard here.

i dunno y i've changed so much... my life totally sucks right now... yea i know i seem so happy, always laughin... but still everything comes back when i'm alone, when i have nth to do, when i'm thinkin... and that's when i start to think too much... everything sucks right now... my family, my skool, my life.

i feel so afraid... i dunno why i'm doin this... i'm probably sick or sth... i set goals too high, i set my expectations too high, knowing full well i wun be able to reach it... and yet, when i dun, i feel so vulnarable, so useless... i dunno why i'm doin this to myself... i just feel that i've changed so much... i guess circumstances made me that way... but u have no idea how much i yearn to go back to da way i used to be...

testing

testing one two three